Your Hidden Hope
The internet dictionary describes hope, the emotion, as an optimistic state of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes with respect to events and circumstances in one’s life or the world at large. As a verb, its definitions include: “expect with confidence” and “to cherish a desire with anticipation”.
When you have “lost hope”, you feel like things are futile. You may resign yourself to things as they are – you passively abandon yourself to whatever is happening in and around you. You believe that nothing will change. You settle.
When you embrace hope, life is beautiful! It is full of excitement, eagerness. You may even compare it to the magic of Christmas for a young child. That anticipation of a jolly, bearded man,dressed in fur from head to toe, who magically comes and leaves presents under the tree – and “oh, what will he bring??”
Yes, children are full of hope, so why do we lose hope as we go through life and how do we get it back?
For some this complete lack of hope can be debilitating and even life threatening. I’m not talking about people who are in that category. I’m talking to those of us who just feel like it’s too hard to keep trying and desiring for better; those of us who are just tired of striving for more and have settled on just going through the motions. This happens a lot in relationships like a marriage.
You’ve heard the expression, “if you’re not growing, you’re dying.” That is so true. Every little thing we do, or don’t do, makes a profound difference on our future. You may not see the consequences until many years down the road, but they will manifest – for your good or your detriment.
As you journey from child to adult you have many, many experiences that may cause your hope to diminish.
- You practiced so hard every day for hours with the hope you would make the baseball team – but you didn’t make the cut.
- You lived a good life, took care of yourself, had lots of great relationships with the hope you would marry a great companion – but the opportunity to marry never happened.
- You did good in school, you got a couple of great college degrees, you even got a great job with the hope of providing a great life for your family – but suddenly you lost your job and eventually had to take out bankruptcy.
Those are just a few examples. There are many little things each day as well. I’m sure you have a number coming to mind right now… The birthday present you didn’t get;the time with a parent that didn’t happen; the special birthday celebration that didn’t come true; the sandwich you wanted in your lunch that wasn’t what you expected…
If you continue to have “disappointments” you may start to lose hope. You may find yourself saying “what’s the use?” or “I give up” or “It’s not worth the effort”.
When that happens it’s time to take a look at your thoughts…
Remember, what you think about, you bring about!
So what are you thinking about? And how can you change those naughty, low-vibrating thoughts to uplifting, hopeful thought?
Just like Edison who found 1000 ways NOT to make a light bulb we can change our destiny by changing our outlook.
May I just add,it is more than just positive thinking. You must have true intent and a true belief in what you are thinking and saying. This is what gives it POWER!!
At first you may not believe it, it may even feel like a lie, but you must do as Napoleon Hill taught and work yourself into a “white heat of desire… and actually believe”.
This is where doubt and futility lose their control and hope starts to take over. Remember, you CHOOSE what thoughts you give power to.
Let’s look at our examples from before. What might happen if we chose to see the good in the situation rather than lose hope:
- When you didn’t make the baseball team, rather than don yourself a failure, you joined debate instead, earned a full-ride scholarship to college and now you are an attorney who helps thousands of people. You still love baseball and you play it whenever you get the chance. But you learned you really LOVE being an attorney even more that you love baseball.
- When the opportunity to marry didn’t materialize, rather than feel sorry for yourself and become bitter and withdrawn, you traveled the world working with underprivileged children and orphanages and found yourself to be so full of love and joy – something you probably would not have been able to do had you married and had a family.
- When you lost every material possession you had, instead of feeling destroyed and like you were nothing, you chose to spend time with you family and together, as a family, you built a business that you all participate in and that provides opportunities to work and grow together and have a lot of quality time together outside of work.
I believe when we are in a “storm” there is something to learn and something better around the corner. That is hope.
So when you find yourself settling, remember, if you are not growing you are dying, so it’s time to choose a new perspective, embrace a new way of thinking and start growing again. This is how you find your hidden hope.